The Real Purpose of Meditation

Meditation seems to be all the rage these days - but most people misunderstand what it is really about.

But before we dive in, let me make a few things clear about this Gas Up:

• I do not meditate (at least not in the traditional sense)
• I am not saying that you need to meditate - it is not for everybody
• The benefits of meditation can be great and can be developed in other ways as well

Now, most people believe the purpose of meditation is to cultivate a level of self-awareness that enables you to be more “present.”

To do this, you spend time working to clear your mind by focusing on things like your breathing or physical sensations in and around your body.

And when your mind begins to wander, you refocus on the physical sensations to bring yourself back to the “present.”

The trouble with this understanding of meditation is that it sets you up for failure.

For those new to meditation, within the first 60 seconds of trying it out, you typically notice your mind wandering almost immediately. Damn it!

Then you get annoyed with yourself for not staying focused.

Then you try again - and again your mind wanders.  Another failure.

After a few minutes, you decide you don’t like yelling at yourself in your thoughts and you stop, giving yourself a little credit for trying.

Mission not accomplished.

But the truth is, meditation is not about being “present” - let me explain.

Meditation is often referred to as a practice.

So what are you practicing exactly?

What you are practicing is letting go.

Our minds were designed to wander.  There is nothing you can do to stop your mind from thinking thoughts.  And unless you are training to become a monk, you likely are not trying to do that either.

In meditation, you are actually practicing the skill of letting go of thoughts.

Our day-to-day lives are mired in worries, concerns, ideas, conflicts, and so on.  And, as we discussed in last week’s Gas Up on emotional comfort zones, we get so used to living in the feelings that those thoughts generate, that our experience of life ends up being about our concerns instead of what is in front of us.

But as we get older and our stressors take on new weight, developing the ability to put aside one concerning thought and focus on what you are doing is priceless.

That is what meditation is about - developing the skill to quickly recognize and let go of one thought and move on or back to what you want to be doing.

We already know that it is largely unproductive to dwell on certain worries or anxieties.  In fact, the constant wrestling with them is actually what makes them worse and makes us feel like sh*t.

The antidote is having the skill to recognize those thought patterns that lead to those feelings - and then letting them pass by.

The ability to do this is a skill.

And like any other skill, to get better at it, you need reps - you need to practice.

Meditation is one form of practice.

So, in actuality, when you sit down to try it and get frustrated that your mind wandered, you are actually doing it right.

And once you let go of the thought that you wandered to, you’ve just done one rep - which is why we call it practice!

But you can practice this skill anywhere and at any time.  You don’t have to be sitting in a meditation space or doing yoga.  You just have to become aware of what you are thinking, recognize that no matter what that thought is, it is temporary.  And let it go.

Letting go of a thought is like releasing your grip on a railing or handle on a bus or a train.  You are gripping hard to hold your balance, but once you release your grip on the thought, you feel relief and can move on.

What are you thinking in this moment?

Can you recognize the thought and then release it?

What would your days be like if you had the skill to instantly move on from certain thoughts on command?

‍

Want free growth coaching tips & strategies like this each week? Subscribe to The Gas Up - our Sunday newsletter - and follow The Growth Coach podcast on Spotify or here on Apple Podcasts.

‍